The question I have continually asked myself over the course of this last year is, how do you forgive someone who hasn’t asked for it or even understands the extent in which they have wronged you? I think of a particular situation in my life that this applies to and I am at a loss for what to do or how to think. The worse part is no one can really give me a good enough answer and when I seek an answer from God I feel as though God has turned His ear away and has grown tired of my supplication. I feel defeated.
I will be returning to the states in a little more than a month. Although the longing to see my family is great, the realities that I must face upon returning are sometimes too painful to bear when I start to think about it. The place I called home is no longer there. The only thing left is the distant memory of the heart of the man that once occupied the land and pumped it full of life. I will be returning to something entirely unfamiliar. Uncertain. Despite it all, I will plow forward.
“The Lord is the strength of his people; he is the saving refuge of his anointed. O save your people, and bless your heritage; be their shepherd and carry them forever.” Psalm 28:8-9
Trust me, I understand exactly how you feel as you return home. Heart broken, home gone, no job, no money, but with amazing new experiences that have changed you so much, but people back home won't necessarily see or understand those changes. I really do know what you feel like!
ReplyDeleteGod has NOT grown tired of you asking the same questions over and over. Keep asking and seeking Him for the answer. Patience comes from God, he will never become impatient or frustrated with you. If there's one thing I learned from traveling so much and being immersed in other cultures, it's that God is the same no matter where you are. The slums or the city. God is the same! I've lived in 4 countries on 3 continents for 2+ years in each of those places and I promise you, God doesn't change, he is the rock you can always stand on.
I know you know this, but being reminded is always good! I love you Rachel, you are SOOOO special to me - If I could choose 10 people to be around all the time you'd be one of them. I'll be in Seattle for a week in August. I know we try every time, but if you're there I'd love to see you! Don't give up, seek the Lord always xxxxxx
Thank you. That means a lot. I am very encouraged by what you have said. Thanks. I will be looking forward to seeing you in Seattle! We will make it happen. Blessings to you!
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